The Body Image Revolution

5 Hidden Beliefs That Block Fully Loving Your Body

Rebecca Sigala Season 1 Episode 44

In this episode of The Body Image Revolution, we're diving into five surprising beliefs that might be holding you back from fully loving your body. With so much chaos and fear in the world, it's easy to get stuck in survival mode and lose sight of self-love. But by shifting our focus, we can transform our reality. I’ll also share an update on The New Sexy mastermind and the amazing results from my recent Glow with Confidence challenge, where women learned to embrace their bodies and feel sexy in just four days. Join me as we explore these beliefs, challenge them, and start creating a loving relationship with our bodies that lasts a lifetime.

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Rebecca Sigala:

Hello, gorgeous. Welcome back to The Body Image Revolution. I'm so glad that you're here right now, especially right now in the midst of so much chaos and fear and hatred in the world. You're here wanting to love your body. It's so incredible. I think that we are, just consuming a lot of news, a lot of media, and it is contributing to the way that we see ourselves and treat ourselves. I think it puts us into fight or flight. It puts us in and out of survival mode. And when we can actually detach from some of that and focus on love, focus on light, on things like connecting to our bodies, we can completely change our reality, no matter what is going on in the world. So I'm so glad that you're here and I'm going to share with you today, five things that might be blocking you from fully embracing your body. Five beliefs. These are things that you might not have thought of before. So I'm really excited to dive into them with you. Before I do that, I just want to give you a little update. We are currently accepting applications to The New Sexy. The New Sexy is my three month transformational mastermind that is going to help you transform from clashing with your inner critic, to feeling sexy as fuck and loving what you see when you look in the mirror for the rest of your life. If you want to hear more about it, I'm going to be sharing more at the end of this episode. So stay tuned. Secondly, I just did this amazing four day challenge called Glow with Confidence. It was absolutely incredible to help women really be able to walk into any room and glow with confidence, go from looking in the mirror and kind of battling with those unloving thoughts to actually feeling sexy as fuck in four days. And it was incredible. Women saw such transformations. First of all, even just the calls were so much fun. I brought wine the first day and we were just like, So connected and so focused on feeling good and feeling sexy versus everything else that we could be focusing on. And even in one day, someone told me that they looked in the mirror and they weren't judging themselves for the first time in a really long time. And that they could look at pictures of themselves that they were once critical of and see the beauty in them. One day, you guys. It's so powerful when you not only have this awareness and education, with the mindset that I give you and this framework to actually start to implement things and embody things. Embodiment really means to take a concept like confidence or self love or taking up space and really feeling it in your body. And that's really what I wanted the four day challenge to do is give people little gems that they can actually implement. Another woman told me that someone commented on her daughter's body and she knew exactly what to say. After two days, Elana told me that she wasn't taking care of herself and her body in the way that she wanted. She was very focused on everyone else and her business and just not tuning in and listening to what she needs and wants. And because of the four day challenge, she started to listen to her body and make beautiful dinners for herself instead of just eating whatever was there. Secondly, she started to clean her house. And she said that she felt like her house was a sanctuary. She just felt so good and expansive and sexy. Ugh, you guys, this literally gives me life. This is exactly why I do what I do. And wow, it just is so powerful. So you can take these things too and start to implement them. And start to shift the way that you see things so that you can shift the way that you see your body and see the world. So I want to go into these five beliefs and I want you to really sit with them and think about how they apply to you, which parts of them you believe, which parts that you don't believe. Be really honest with yourself. All of your feelings are totally welcome here. It's safe to feel your feelings, good, bad, ugly, all of them. There's nothing even bad. It's just being here, being with yourself, meeting yourself where you're at, which is actually the first step of my method, which I'll get into in a little bit. Okay. So The first one is something that A lot of women, a lot of people experience when they're on their personal development journey and they're thinking, I shouldn't be dealing with my inner critic anymore. I should be further along on this journey. So every time they look in the mirror, it's not only that they're being judgmental of themselves, but they're being judgmental of being judgmental of themselves. And that causes so much pain. So much disconnection from ourselves and our bodies. But when we actually can start to meet ourselves where we're at with compassion and kindness, that is what opens the door to a loving relationship with your body. You can't hate yourself into a version of yourself that you love. I've heard from a lot of people this year. Telling me that they feel like they've taken steps back on their journey that they've really worked on things like with their confidence and self love and then with everything going on in the world and just having such a stressful year they feel like they have taken steps back and then they're looking in the mirror and they're being really critical of themselves and they're like what this is not me like what's going on here I should not be dealing with this anymore and. The first thing we really have to do is to come with compassion for ourselves, because it makes so much sense that we're there right now. You should not be further along. You are exactly where you need to be right now. And when we sit in that, then we can actually form this loving relationship. You can't hate yourself into a version of yourself that you love. I also want to offer you that if you feel like you're going backwards on your personal development journey, that those things are just coming up for a reason. It doesn't mean you're going backwards, but it's an opportunity for you to go deeper. That has really helped me on my own, and I hope that will help you. The second thought is I can accept my body, but I don't need to love everything about it. And I think this is really a reaction to the pressures that we're getting on both sides. On one hand, we're being told that our bodies are bad, that we need to fix them, that they'll never be good enough. And then on the other hand, we're being told that It's only the insides that matter and we should be confident and we should just love ourselves. And people just don't want to be dealing with those pressures anymore. And they're like, fuck it. I am who I am. This is my body. Let's just be neutral about it. And I totally get it. It can totally be a step on your journey. But what I actually stand for, for my clients is the possibility. The very, very real possibility of fully embracing your body and being able to love what you see when you look in the mirror. It's possible. I've done it. Hundreds of my clients have done it and you can do it too. We don't need to resign to the fact that we hate our bodies. That's actually buying into beauty standards because we've been told that. What if all bodies are good bodies? What if all bodies are actually beautiful? we're just a part of nature, just like the sunset or snowflakes that are all uniquely beautiful in their own way. We're just a part of nature. We're divinely created and we're beautiful as we are. So just being able to see that truth and see that beauty in ourselves is actually outside of any societal messaging. To love yourself or to not love yourself or any of that. And it's so, so empowering. So if you're thinking,"I can accept my body", it's really a signal to yourself that you're resigning and that you're just fine with the way that you're thinking about yourself right now. And that is not going to actually motivate you to, change or to fully love your body because you're just like, this is just how it is. And that's it. Just like, you know, walking around thinking that it's a fact that our butt is too big. Our stomachs are too big. Our face is not symmetrical when these are just ideas that were put into our minds. They're not true. The third belief that may be blocking you from fully loving your body is, if I act confident, I will be confident. How many times have we heard that? Fake it till you make it. This doesn't work. It hasn't worked. It's never going to work. People can go their entire lives pretending to be confident, but not actually having a loving internal dialogue with themselves. What we actually have to do is start gradually shifting our beliefs. It doesn't have to take so long, but we do need to go through an actual framework to change the way that we see ourselves. We can't just repeat affirmations and try to convince ourselves of something we don't believe. That's why I'm really, a proponent of just meeting yourself, just being like, okay, this is where I am right now. I don't need to pretend to be something else. I don't need to prove anything to anyone else. I'm looking in the mirror and I'm clashing with my inner critic. Okay. That makes so much sense. And if you can just come. In that way, you actually develop more self trust and more confidence because you're connected to what's actually really going on in your mind. So no more faking it until you make it. The fourth thought that may be blocking you is that there are more important things in the world than if I like what I see when I look in the mirror, or there's something materialistic about loving what I see when I look in the mirror or something vain about it. When we believe that, then of course we don't want to start to fully embrace ourselves. We don't want to be vain. We don't want to be self centered. There are really crazy things happening in the world where people are suffering. Of course, it's more important that someone lives versus someone looking in the mirror and loving what they see, but it is so important that you love what you see when you look in the mirror. And that doesn't mean that you have to fit into societal standards. That does not mean that you have to be seen as beautiful by other people. But when you look in the mirror, if you're meeting yourself with disdain and resentment and unloving thoughts, then that is how you're going to be showing up in every other aspect of your life too. This is really just a relationship with ourselves and seeing the truth of who we are. And if we deny that we are denying our birthright. Our birthright to feel good in our bodies, to feel sexy, to have a positive body image. Everybody deserves that. Why would we not? Why is sexy only reserved for certain people who look a certain way? Fuck that. Fuck that. It is your birthright. It is my birthright to, it is our birthright to feel sexy as fuck and love what we see when we look in the mirror. And that is going to connect us to our life force, to our creative center, to moving past these basic needs and survival mode and really entering a creative zone and self actualization, full expression of who we are. It is the most empowering feeling. It is the most beautiful feeling to be able to walk in the world and not only see the beauty in other people, but really see it in yourself. The interesting thing is that people think that if you love your body, you're just going to be obsessing about your body all day, but nothing could be further than the truth. You're actually thinking about your body way less. When you're struggling with the way that you look, you're having this negative thought loop all day, even if it's something that's a little bit unconscious or a little bit in the back of your mind, it's still always there. And you're focusing on your body and the way you look and this and that versus waking up in the morning, feeling amazing, loving what you see when you look in the mirror and then going about your day and having so much more brain space to be your real self, to dive into things that you're passionate about, to connect with other people. And then sure, if you take a picture or you glimpse at yourself in, a window as you walk by, you're like, damn, that's amazing. Like that only enhances your day, but you're actually not so focused. It's the opposite of being vain. When, we love ourselves. Then we give other people the opportunity to also love themselves too. And we can hold space for people. We have more emotional space for them to actually, share things with us and move through their emotions, instead of us being centered on ourselves. So that is the first four. And the fifth one might be a little bit more obvious, but it's the thought that I need to lose weight or I need to fix something about my body in order to love it. Of course, this would be blocking anyone from fully loving their body, because if you're thinking that there's something wrong with your body, then how could you fully love it as it is right now? I really see this as a scarcity mindset where nothing will ever be enough. This is what diet culture has taught us, so there's absolutely no shame in it. So many women feel this way. I've felt this way and there's nothing wrong with feeling like you want to lose weight because that's the most, unfortunately, normal thing in the world. But that is one of the major things that's actually just blocking you from loving your body, from being kind to yourself, from feeling like,"I am amazing. I am worthy exactly as I am right now." And the thing is, is that losing weight or"fixing" something about our body is always a band aid solution. It's never long lasting because our bodies are going to change again. What about when you gain weight or lose weight or have a surgery or have a baby, go through life, get older, everyone's getting older. You can't stop that. And then what are you going to do? I have four stages of body love and one of them is body perfectionism. When we're really stuck in this place of feeling like we need to fix something about our bodies. And this focus really takes away our power and our pleasure. It distracts us from the things that we really want in life. What do we want out of losing weight? What do we want out of changing things about our body? Ask yourself why? And are those things attainable without that? The answer is yes. What we really want to do is actually start to give you the tools to love your body, no matter what the season, no matter how your body changes. So focusing on weight loss, focusing on changing something about your body is taking you away from loving it. And moving you into this place of scarcity and not feeling grateful and just being in this negative loop that is exactly the thing that we want to get out of. And the thing is, it's just this ever changing goalpost and it's never going to be enough because once you lose weight or change something about your body. There's always going to be the next thing to do, and it's not long lasting. So what we really want to create here is this unwavering body confidence through all the body changes. And just because you're battling with your inner critic or clashing with it when you look in the mirror, that doesn't mean that you're sitting in bed and crying and not doing the things that you need to do to have a functional life. You're doing all those things. You have businesses and jobs and kids and you're going out, but then inside you're still battling that inner critic. And it's just taking up way too much brain space. So I want you to really, write these beliefs down. And the thing that we actually have to do is we have to gradually shift them. Can't just turn it around and okay, now I don't need to lose weight. Now loving my body is the most important thing in the world. But just even being aware that these are the things that are blocking us already starts to create shifts and magic in our lives. So I'm really excited to hear what that does for you. If any of this resonated with you, I want you to stick around for just a couple of minutes because I want to share how we can work together in The New Sexy mastermind. And before I tell you about it, I want you to know that after The New Sexy, you're not going to ever need anything. Not Botox, not weight loss products or programs, not a piece of lingerie. You're never going to need anything outside of yourself to feel sexy. And I know that if you're here, then you're craving to feel connected with your body to just, wake up in the morning and feel so fucking sexy. Not only that, but you want to feel amazing when you're intimate with your partner. You want to pass on a positive body image for your children and be a role model. You want to just feel like a freaking goddess, radiant and light and amazing. For you, for everyone around you. And one of the things that I know that God sent me to this earth to do is help you with that. And that's exactly what we're going to be doing inside The New Sexy mastermind. The New Sexy is a transformational experience that in three months, I'm going to help you go from where you are right now to loving, not just accepting or resigning, loving what you see when you look in the mirror and feeling sexy as fuck for the rest of your life. Here's what we do. And I shared this with you, that we meet yourself where you are, which is my first step. This is something that you're probably not doing right now because you might be meeting yourself with that criticism when you look in the mirror and all these unloving thoughts. And what happens with this is that you're creating a negative relationship with yourself. You're like, Ugh, I don't like what I see. And it's never going to change. And then on top of it, I shouldn't be thinking that the judgment on top of judgment. All of that makes you unavailable, energetically unavailable, to receive what you want in life. And then it affects our physical health. It creates stress. It creates this feeling of being less than other women when you go out, not feeling confident to go after your dreams or what you truly desire. Just because you haven't looked and challenged those deep seated beliefs and actually transform them. Not just try to convince yourself out of them. We need to start there. We need to meet you where you're at. We need to do it with kindness and we need to be really honest about what you're still saying to yourself. Because that needs to change in order for you to elevate the way you see yourself. And then the fun part is that you're going to look in the mirror and be like, damn, I am so sexy. Is this really me? Like, this is amazing. Once we start meeting you where you're at and shifting those beliefs, then I can help you break free from societal bullshit so that you can wake up in the morning and walk through the world, seeing yourself and seeing other people with completely new eyes. It's like being in love again. It's the best feeling ever. Before one of my clients started The New Sexy, she cringed at the word'sexy'. She told me on the first call that she could not stand the word sexy. She didn't feel sexy. She felt that sexy was just not for her. She had a lot of thoughts on it, especially with the way that she grew up. And then through our work together and going through my method, she is actually breaking free from the definition of what society gives us as sexy and what beauty is"supposed to be". And she started to feel sexy. She woke up in the morning. And she was loving what she saw. This not only helped her feel sexy, but it also helped her recognize not only her physical beauty, but her internal beauty and her gifts. And it was really cool to see because after 40 years old, she did a complete career change and almost doubled her income. Really fucking amazing. So then, after that step, you're going to be feeling sexy. You're going to be living it more consistently. and now we want it to be in your environment. We want it to be around you. And that's something that I help you with. You're not only going to just feel sexy on the inside and the outside, but that entire environment is going to amplify that from your home decor and your closet and your personal style and your morning routine. It's going to be so fun, easy, and liberating that you're going to just be like, I'd wish I'd done this earlier. Then once we shift you from the inside out, you're looking and feeling radiant and sexy, you're feeling your environment and it's all amazing, but then what about your kids? What about the people around you? The thing that is so cool is that once you get all of this for you, then you also get to pass it on to all the people in your life who will literally look up to you as one of the most radiant and confident women in their lives. And they'll be like, I want what she's having. How does she do it? Like, what even is this? Imagine if your daughter came to you or your niece came to you or nephew, because they were being bullied about their bodies. Like this person called me fat today. This person said that I'm too skinny, whatever it might be. And then you don't know what to say because, the truth is, right now, that's how you're feeling about yourself, but imagine how different it could be. This really reminds me of my client, Elisheva, who, when we started working together was feeling so many negative feelings towards her body. she didn't feel good, even though everything was great from the outside, like her business and she's stylish and fun, and no one would ever think that she didn't feel good about herself on the inside. She also didn't know how to talk to her daughter about her body. And then after working together, she was able to hold space for her daughter, and she was able to navigate this conversation that they had. It was a really important conversation because her five year old, five, okay guys, five, came home and someone in her dance class told her that she was too fat to be in that dance class. And because she went through these steps and started to transform her own relationship with her body, she was able to hold that space. And her daughter is going to have a completely different life when it comes to her body and to her relationship with her body, and that's so priceless. It is invaluable. There is no price that you can put on the legacy that you're going to leave behind when you do this for yourself. And this is so important, especially right now. There's so much hate. There's so much fear and let's be the light. Let's be the love. Let's connect to our bodies. Let's give our families that energetic protection. It's one thing going through this time period thinking, Oh my gosh, we're going to have so much trauma. And it's another thing thinking, I can provide a loving healing, compassionate space for myself and for others. And then by the end of it, you're feeling like, wow, I'm stronger. I'm more resilient. We moved through all of these things together. Not that it was easy, but it's a protection of our life forces and giving us the opportunity to not just be in survival mode, but to go beyond it and to be connected to our creativity and our bodies and all of the things that we really want out of life. I hope you enjoyed this episode. I'm going to put the link for you to book a free discovery call in the show notes and that discovery call is transformational in and of itself because we're going to really see where you're at on this journey and where you want to go, and if The New Sexy is the next steps to take you there. I really want to explore if we're a good fit. I'm very selective about who's in this program because we're creating this whole beautiful reality and community that is uplifting and supporting each other and on the same path. If this resonated with you, if you have that little pull in your body, if you're feeling it, don't hesitate. It's completely free and we'll just dream a little bit together. All right, I hope you have a great day or night wherever you are and I will see you soon.