The Body Image Revolution
The Body Image Revolution
Get in the Picture With Sharoni Galeano
This episode features the wonderful and talented Sharoni Galeano, a visual storyteller and portrait photographer in Israel. Sharoni has always been very vocal about women, especially mothers, being present in pictures and overcoming the fears that might be associated with that. We talk about why that concept is important to her, Sharoni’s own body image story, body neutrality, detaching our worth to how we look in photos, and tips on how to face discomfort and improve our body image overall.
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Hello, beautiful humans. Welcome back to the Body Image Revolution, my podcast where we get real and vulnerable about how to actually improve our body image and love ourselves in our world today. Today is a very special day because I'm talking to Sharoni Galeano, an incredibly talented visual storyteller and portrait photographer here in Israel. We've been photographer friends for at least a few years now, and between our conversations, I just knew I had to have her on the podcast. We share so many values when it comes to empowering women. And helping people feel comfortable in their own skin, and I just cannot wait for you guys to hear what she has to say. Welcome, Sharoni. I am so happy that you're here.
Sharoni Galeano:Thanks. I'm very excited to be here. I love podcasts and I happen to love yours, and I've been listening to it since you put it out, so I'm just very excited to be part of it.
Rebecca Sigala:Oh my God. Yay. I'm so honored. Thank you so much. OK, so let's get to know you a little bit before we start diving in into all of our topics that we want to talk about. I'd love to hear where you're from and a little bit about how you got into doing photography.
Sharoni Galeano:Okay, so I was born and raised in Brooklyn, New York, and I always loved photos. Was always the friend in the friend group taking photos when disposable cameras point and shoot digital cameras. I was always the one taking pictures. But I always loved it. When I made Aliyah after high school. It wasn't really part of what I was doing at the time. I. I was living here. I met my husband, we got married and he had to finish his degree in New York and I had to kind of take a pause from what I was doing in university, which I was really just in university to kind of like make a check and get the degree. so I had no problem taking the Year off. We flew to New York, he finished his exchange program and I had nothing to do. I had really liked to cook and my sister-in-law said, you know what, there's a kosher culinary school. You should take a course. I think you'd love it. So I went and I loved it, and it just, lit a fire in me loved cooking. And I said, you know what? Let me start a food blog, because at the time, everyone was starting food blogs. So I started a food blog and what do you need to do a food blog? You need to be able to take pictures of food. And my pictures were horrible and at the time I don't, I don't
Rebecca Sigala:even believe that Sharoni that's not No,
Sharoni Galeano:don't believe it. Believe it. I was using those horrible Instagram filters that everyone used, and all my pictures were yellow and grainy and super close up, and they were horrible.
Rebecca Sigala:Oh my gosh. I know exactly what you're talking about.
Sharoni Galeano:And basically that was already towards the end of the year, I was working at a kosher restaurant, a French restaurant in New York, and I was doing the food blog on the side and we'd come back to Israel and I said, okay, while I go back to university, I really want to learn how to take pictures. with A camera professionally for my food blog. So in order to take a food photography course that I wanted to take, I had to learn how to use my camera.'cause I was only using automatics, so I had to take a regular photography course. And you had to take
Rebecca Sigala:a course before you took a course?
Sharoni Galeano:Yeah, like I had to take basically the basics of how to use your camera before I can do the food photography course. So it's really focused on like styling and lighting. Hmm. But I had no idea to operate my camera. I thought using automatic was how you use a camera, which I think a lot of people do in the beginning. and I took the course and there was a ton of homework and I just started taking pictures of people. And every time I would take a picture of someone, people would be like, oh my God, this is amazing. Like, this is so good. What are you doing? Taking pictures of food? Take pictures of people. And I was like, no, that's not even my plan. Like, I'm not doing that. I'm gonna be a food blogger, like get with the program and. I just started taking pictures of people more and more and it just snowballed. I started offering photo shoots to friends and family if they let me put it on Facebook. And that's just how I started my business. And when I was pregnant with Yehoshua, I remember I was my last year at university and I told my husband like, listen, like I really wanna do this. I really like doing this. What do you think? And he's like, listen, anyways, you're gonna give birth. Give yourself a year, like give it a year. Let's give it a year and see what happens. If it works, great. If it doesn't, we'll just figure something else out. And that's what I did. I gave it a year and now it's been seven and it's amazing. And I love what I do, my gosh, seven years and I wouldn't change it for anything. And I hope I can always do this and always, you know, show up, give a hundred percent so I never have to do anything else because I really, truly love what I'm doing.
Rebecca Sigala:That's amazing. That's amazing how you just kind of took every single opportunity along the way and were open to the fact that, you know, you didn't know what you were going to do and you just kind of embraced it as you went. And I think that's really amazing.
Sharoni Galeano:Definitely. I think that like, Sometimes all the things like throughout life that people say that you struggle with, like sticking with things, um, being consistent. Like sometimes the flip side of that could also be beneficial to you. You know, just going with the flow, trying new things, not being scared, not thinking too much. Like those are things that sometimes even if in regular day life or when you're young, they might not be good for you. Sometimes they're the things that actually lead you to what you're supposed to be doing, which I think is amazing.
Rebecca Sigala:Yeah, especially the things that you are really, truly passionate about, because I think that in society there's so many rules about what success is, or whatever it may be. And when we follow those rules so stringently, then we kind of lose ourselves in them. And we don't get to really find out who we are and what we want to do. Like I don't think that I would've ever thought that I would become a photographer. That wasn't even an option. It was like, okay, do you wanna be a teacher or a doctor or a lawyer? And it was not even something that was discussed. So me being open to things that were like, Against the grain and not within the rules of what my culture was or my family was. It was so much more, fulfilling to me to be able to explore different things and figure out what I really wanna do.
Sharoni Galeano:I think also like that going with the grain is really just meant for like half of society. And then there's the other half who are the creatives that just, even if you try to shove them into a box, you just can't do it. We cannot get in there. Yeah, we can try, but we won't fit True.
Rebecca Sigala:It's so true. And I also love that you took a culinary course because I, I definitely thought about that a few times. I feel like photographers have a lot of similar interests and like the creativity is just like there and there's so much that we could go into and I love that it kind of led you to photography just so naturally.
Sharoni Galeano:Definitely. I think like the best part of what I do is just like doing something different every day. Seeing new people every day, going to new places every day, like that's what I just feel like even seeing it, like it like puts me in a good mood. I can't sit and do the same thing every day seeing the same people. They need the dynamic aspect of my life to constantly be moving.
Rebecca Sigala:Yeah, totally. I relate to that so much. And also just like seeing the new images, like each new session, each new photo is like, it just brings so much joy and inspiration to my life and you wouldn't think that,'cause you're like, oh, you do so many shoots, or you have so many clients, but everyone is so different and unique and beautiful and, it definitely like adds that extra oomph in my life, for sure. For sure. okay. Well, I'm really excited to get into your ideas about women empowerment, body image, and perhaps a little bit about your story as well. One of the main reasons why I really wanted to talk to you is because over the years you've posted such incredible content that I feel like really speaks specifically to women and about getting into pictures, overcoming their insecurities, the value of images, and really helping women. Essentially be comfortable in their own skin and be present enough that they can fully enjoy these moments with their families. And I love seeing that. I love how passionate you are about it. And I guess my question for you is, why is that important to you? Like what, what about that message is personal to you and why did you become so passionate about communicating those?
Sharoni Galeano:So I think when I started taking photos I had no idea how it would touch me personally and how much actually my clients would teach me about myself and my own life and about people in general. Yeah. I think only when you work in the field that we do, you realize that it's really not about photos. It's really about connecting with people, making them feel comfortable, and you learn so much about human beings. For me, which I think is the same for you. I learned so much about women and I learned so much about mothers and motherhood. And I became a mother simultaneously as I started my business. So it started that I would take photos of people, Once a year, twice a year or, and then like every year I'd have the same clients coming to me for the pregnancy, newborn Bris, whatever, first birthday, second birthday. And I really admire that.'cause I don't know how it was for you growing up. My parents took a lot of pictures, but we didn't like do photo shoots ever. Yeah. And I thought, wow. Like same. That's so beautiful to see these women valuing. Taking photos, being in the photos and making sure like they don't miss this opportunity.
Rebecca Sigala:And not just valuing photos, but valuing like artistic photos that they can really show up. In a way that is real and authentic and have moments with their families. Because when you said, I don't know what it was like for you growing up, I was thinking of like JC Penny photo shoots and like the background.
Sharoni Galeano:I never even did that. I had never even heard, oh my God. Um, I don't know. But so I learned a lot from my clients and I became a mom and. During the time that I had my first one, I was probably in the worst state of being in terms of my own personal body image and how I saw myself. Mm-hmm. I think that a lot of times, Now, I think social media's super different. We see all different kinds of women, all different kinds of motherhood. What it's like you can see an actual postpartum body. No one spoke to me about any of that. I had no idea. Um, yeah, and I couldn't remove myself from not liking how I looked. It was, it consumed me at the time, so much so that. Probably from when Yehoshua was born until he's like three. I might have five images total with him. Wow. And I was with him all day. He stayed home with me, until he was, I think a year and a half, a year and seven months. My husband traveled two weeks a month during that time. So I was his everything and I'm not in any pictures.
Rebecca Sigala:Do you think that shifted when you became a mother or was it something that you were always concerned about, even like when you were a late teen, early adult?
Sharoni Galeano:I think that it started close to like, you know, getting married, trying to conceive, getting pregnant, all of that stuff that's like was the height of all of it. Yeah. But it only became apparent to me when I had him and like after that it was so bad that. And I, I talked about this on my Instagram specifically because I don't want people to make the same mistake. but for example, I hated the way I looked in the Bris photos, and then I, I deleted myself. I deleted the photos. Wow. That I was in at his Bris. They, they're gone and I can never get them back. They are gone. Oh my gosh. Um, but the reason why this is so important to me is I'm coming from a place of. Actually knowing and identifying with how people are feeling like a deep place. So I can never get those back. I can never go back to when he was a baby and be in pictures. I can never undelete the pictures that I deleted. Like it's gone. The moment is gone. And what I try to say always on social media is you'll never regret a picture that you. Take only the ones that you don't. You can never go back in time. You can take a picture and not like it, but in a year from now, two years from now, three years from now, you won't remember what you didn't like about it. You'll just remember where was I? Yehoshua's gonna look back at those photos and be like, Mom, were you there? Like where? Who was taking care of me? It was me, but I'm just not in the pictures. And when you think about it objectively, right. Let's say you're thinking about someone else in a scenario, you can say, just be in the pictures. That's so crazy. But when you're in it, it's really, really hard to think this way. But we have to think this way. So we don't get to the point where we're like, what was I doing? You know?
Rebecca Sigala:Totally. I talk to so many women who tell me that they look back on images of themselves and then they wonder, oh my gosh, why did I feel badly about myself then? Why was I so insecure? I look so great. I look so beautiful, I look so happy. And I do really feel like with distance and time from the actual moment, if you are feeling insecure in the moment, those thoughts just naturally change.
Sharoni Galeano:I think there's a few things we have to realize. Like, and I say we like,'cause we all have to remind ourselves, and this is totally, extremely important, is like photos are our story. They are like a collection of images that make up the story of our lives. When you come, take one person out of it, take two people out of it, and you're not consistent. You can't read a book if it's missing chapters. Yeah, you're part of that. So the minute you take yourself out of it, it's not a whole story. Your kids aren't gonna look back. And if you don't have kids, you are not gonna look back, your parents, your friends, and say, oh, what were you wearing? You look terrible. They're gonna be like, oh my gosh. I remember that trip to the north, to Disneyland. I remembered like when we used to sit on the couch Friday mornings in our pajamas. That was my favorite time. They're not gonna about the things that you think you're gonna think about. They're just gonna see life that was lived. And remember the memories that they can't actually remember. They need the pictures to remember them.
Rebecca Sigala:Yeah, and it's just so important for people to be able to access those feelings when they grow up. Like for me, I. Having a little bit of a complicated relationship with some of my family and then being able to look back and see what beautiful memories we shared and the laughing definitely, and the love and the presentness is just like, oh, wow. Like that just really fills my heart with joy in a way that I wouldn't be able to have access to if I didn't have those images. So to think that maybe my parents would've been. Insecure or deciding intentionally not to be in those images would've been so sad. I mean, it's very understandable. I completely get it. But also there is so much value in that, not just for us, but for our children and for generations to come. For sure. For sure. So what was that point that you realized, holy shit, I'm not in any of these pictures and I want to change this.
Sharoni Galeano:So I think it was, he must have been like two or three, and I sat down to like organize albums that I was gonna make for like, you know, the first year, second year type of thing.and All the pictures were either him alone or him with my husband. I wasn't any of them. And I was with him 99.9% of the time. And I think then it just hit me, it's like I wasn't even there. Like it's as if I was the traveling parent or I was like, Part-time custody, but I was out of the picture. I was not in images, I wasn't there. And I think that it hit me really strong then. And I kind of just made a commitment to myself that I was gonna be in pictures and I'm just, I'm not gonna care. I like them. I don't like them. I'm not even gonna look at them. I'm just gonna make sure that no matter what, I am in as many pictures as I can be in.
Rebecca Sigala:And this was at the same time that you were photographing other families as well. So you were, it was very much on your mind, like, wow, this is really special and beautiful and important and like, I want this for my family too.
Sharoni Galeano:And it helped me because the more and more women showed up and like confided in me that they were nervous and they were doing this because they weren't in pictures with their family. They didn't like the pictures that they had with their family. They felt like no one was taking pictures of them. It just, it drilled it into me of how I needed to be and how I needed to make sure that I showed up in a way that helped my clients be present, not worry, and know that I was gonna make my sole purpose to get those mother children pictures. Oh my gosh. I get that pictures too for every dad that might listen to this. I do worry about the dads, but my priority has. And has been and always will be the mothers I can't help myself. so I think that they probably appreciate that, definitely because I think that they know that it's important to me and I've always worked from a place, I think we've spoken about this before. I always work from a place where I do things the way I'd want to experience them and I know that I would want the photographer to make sure that I have these moments and when I come I think, you know what, what would I want? Some of the photograph of me with my two boys. And then I try to replicate that for my clients. I try to learn about them before so I know what their relationship dynamics are like. because I want them to look back and really feel. What they experienced at the time and the mom to leave and feel like, you know what, I got it. I finally have it. You know?
Rebecca Sigala:Such an amazing feeling. I know exactly what you're talking about. Were you surprised by the way that women were perceiving themselves or perceiving their bodies, the struggles that they had?
Sharoni Galeano:When you first started? Um, I think I was surprised really when I first started. I was surprised to find out that we all kind of feel the same. Yeah, I guess. Which, you know, you know that too, but I didn't know it right away. Right. So I think that like, also, I think all of those same things are what kind of impact me on a personal level and made me realize like we can either all be so caught up with how we look or we can just live our lives and I really choose to just live it. I don't wanna be caught up with this. I just wanna live my life and I want it to be captured and I want. My kids to look back at it and enjoy it, and it's something that I want for myself and I want for every single woman that follows me, and that's why I talk about it all the time because I want every woman to not miss out on this and on her life.
Rebecca Sigala:That's so beautiful. Okay, I have a couple questions. I think firstly, when it relates to your clients, what do you say to them when they tell you about their concerns about being photographed or the way that they look or the way that their body is? How do you help them through that? And then I wanna hear about your own process for yourself.
Sharoni Galeano:Okay, So something that I think is super important. And first I'm gonna say what I don't do, and then I'm gonna say what I do do. Perfect. Um, what I don't do is if someone says they don't like how they look, I don't say, you look beautiful. I think that's stupid. And I think that agree. If someone has like deep seated things that they're working through, which we all have, it's not a one person type of thing. telling someone, oh, you don't, does not help them. It's not gonna change anything. It's gonna make them feel invalidated, and I don't wanna do that. So what I exactly do do is I remind them what I truly believe in and what is a fact, is that photos are not only for now, they're not about how we feel now, how we look now, they're for the future. They are a priceless legacy that you're leaving for yourself, for your family, for your friends. Um, It's not about the here and now. So we have to separate ourselves from what we're feeling now and think about the future. That's what a photo's for. Um, the same way that a diamond becomes more valuable with time, a photo becomes more valuable with time because we can't solely rely on the memories in our brain. They fade, but photos last forever. So I remind them of that. I remind them of how. They look at photos from their family or their parents and how much they mean to them, and that's what they're doing for themselves and for their kids or their future kids. That's really what I try to stick with and remind them because I think really when it comes down to once you look at photos that way, which is truly how we should be looking at photos, everything will shift and change and kind of let people. Not disregard the things that they're feeling, which are real and valid, but just look at things from a different perspective and give it that perspective, more value to kind of help us forget or, or work through the other stuff.
Rebecca Sigala:Yeah. It kind of just gives you perspective and I think you gain that perspective yourself. When you were consumed with the way that you looked in these images from your son's brit milah and then you deleted them and you're like, Learning this lesson on your own, like, oh my gosh, I wish I wouldn't have done that because this is the value of them. It goes beyond me. And having that perspective can be so, so helpful. And I also like that you said that. It's not about disregarding those feelings that you have. It's not just like, oh, no, no, no, don't worry. Like you're beautiful. Just be quiet and let me take a picture of you. It's like, no, I totally get that. Like that makes a lot of sense. This is the society that we live in. Of course, you feel X, Y, and Z about yourself. Of course you're gonna have these thoughts and insecurities, but also like think about it this way, like let's kind of like take a step back and see the full picture.
Sharoni Galeano:Exactly. Exactly. And I also think that, obviously I reassure them that this is my profession and it's my job to make them feel good and feel comfortable. And I start that experience without saying you're gonna feel comfortable making them feel that way from our first conversation through our entire course of working together. Through the ends of the photo shoot because I know that I can nurture the experience to make them feel their best. And my job as a photographer, our job is to, we know how to photograph people, right? We're not, Messing around. We know that our job is to make them feel good and look good, and that's all part of the experience, but also our hands and knowing what we're doing. So yeah, that's also part of it. But the main thing that I tell them is this. Like when someone comes to me and says, I wanna do a photo shoot, but I'm nervous because X, Y, and Z, that's kind of the thing that I lead with, to kind of help them understand that that's how I approach the whole experience and how I want them to also,
Rebecca Sigala:Right, and it's so incredible that they feel safe enough to be able to tell us the things that are going through their minds and be vulnerable and open. Because putting that out there I think is just really helpful for the person being photographed and for us to make that connection. But mostly for them to just be like, this is how I'm feeling. I'm not just gonna like push it down and avoid it like I'm feeling like this. And for us to be like, We see you, we get you. I think just that in itself helps them feel more comfortable and like they can just be themselves. You mentioned, the fact that we are professional photographers, and this is something that I really wanted to address on this. Podcast because so many women constantly tell me that they hate the way that they look in pictures and they got these pictures back from the Bar Mitzvah photographer, or their husband took a picture of them on their iPhone, or they didn't realize that someone was taking a picture and they took it from this weird angle and now they feel like, this is exactly how I look, right. Oh no. And they have like, I know and they associate that image with the way that they actually look. They're like, oh, I was actually feeling good about myself, but now I see this image and I look like shit. And I'm always just like, no, that's not how, oh my God. That's the worst thing. Yeah, I do hear that a lot too.
Sharoni Galeano:Yes. And I wanna say that your uncle or your husband who doesn't know how to operate an iPhone cannot take a picture that's representative of how you actually look like. I don't understand. It's so I know it and you know it'cause we know how to take pictures. But like, yes. When I see someone getting upset about a picture with a person who's like, finger is on the lens, I'm like, are you really trusting them to take a picture? Like, are we really gonna judge ourselves based on that guy's picture? You shouldn't be, you know? Yeah. I think people have to realize, most people don't know how to take pictures. They just don't. Yes.
Rebecca Sigala:Exactly. Exactly. And it's like, I just, I wish I could, I don't know, like put it on a billboard somewhere so that women would truly understand that. And I think that when they see, like us taking pictures, they're like, oh, well they're just really good photographers and they know how to manipulate it so that like I look better. Or like they take it from an angle that I look thinner for, or they do crazy Photoshop. Yeah, I, you and I both don't do that. Let's talk about that.
Sharoni Galeano:I'm very, very verbal about the fact that, and, and I believe this, like the worst thing I could do is make someone look different than how they look and be like, oh, this makes you look better. Because what would I be leaving a client with? They would be like, I can never look like that. I don't look like that. And then feel worse about themselves. The best thing I can do, and what I strive to do, and I know that you do it too, is. To see them how they are, photograph them in the best light by making them feel comfortable, by communicating with them, by making an experience that makes them feel at ease. Showing them an image that's representative of how beautiful they actually are, and then seeing how it affects. How they feel about themselves? Yes, because that's the most powerful thing. Like my favorite moments are when we started a photo shoot in the beginning. Sometimes it's a little awkward and I always tell clients, ride it through. It's gonna not feel awkward in 10 minutes. Getting some pictures and then showing her photos and seeing what it does to her, like. She'll like light up and be like, I can't believe that's me, but like it is you and it's an unedited photo, right? We're looking at the back unedited, the
Rebecca Sigala:camera unedited. I always have to mention that you're like, hello girl.
Sharoni Galeano:You're looking at the back of my camera and you're seeing how gorgeous you are. That's who you are. I did nothing like that is who you are. And I don't do crazy editing. I don't make people look different, thinner, taller, shorter. I don't do any of that. Like I don't believe in that. Yes. So knowing that we have the power to show someone how they actually look, Yeah. And make them feel good about themselves is the best thing in the whole entire world.
Rebecca Sigala:That's amazing. Yeah, and I do think it's a combination of our photography talent, of course, but also, like you said, creating that space for them to feel comfortable the combination of those two gives us the opportunity to reflect back to them a picture of themselves that is actually way more authentic to how they look than anything else.And I just really want people to understand that and to not fall into this trap of like, This, quote unquote bad image of me is exactly right how I look. And that's it. And then also like, not just the person's lack of ability to take a good photo, but also you're standing there uncomfortable. Your shoulders might be your over your clench, your jaw. Yeah, exactly. Like and you're feeling, not confident in how this photo's gonna turn out and not confident. Or present within yourself. Of course, of course the picture's not gonna look like you. You know what I mean?
Sharoni Galeano:Of course. It's not even a question. And I think that it just stinks to know that so many people, which is why I try to talk about this a lot, are seeing photos of themselves on a phone and thinking, oh my God, like I just shouldn't be in picture. That's the worst thing you could do. It's the worst thing really.
Rebecca Sigala:Yeah, totally. Yeah. So I feel like there's like these conversations that we're having where it's like, okay, yeah, there's this neutrality where you want women to have, which is like, okay, yeah, I totally get that. You feel like this, and also this image is beyond you. And like what I want for you is to be able to look at this image and just not have it be so emotionally charged. Just know that it's important that you're in them. It's one thing and then another thing. Is like if you do that, if you do that and you allow yourself to just be and to be present, then it actually does lead you to liking how you see yourself, liking how you look more, you know what I mean? So like what, what is it? Is it both? Is it, how do you see that?
Sharoni Galeano:Uh, I can tell you the process that I went through. That is what I, yes. Hope. Everyone should go through. I, this is what I recommend, basically. I think you should just, I just committed to myself that I'm gonna be in pictures no matter what. I'm not gonna look in the mirror and fix myself before. I'm not gonna stare at the picture after and hyper-analyze it. I'm gonna be in a picture and that is it. I'm gonna move on from it. Not gonna stare at it. You'll never catch me being like, show me the picture. You know how someone will say, take a picture and then let me see it, and then take it again. I will never do that. I just don't care. And realize that?
Rebecca Sigala:Is it that you don't care, or did you make a decision not to care?
Sharoni Galeano:I. Now I don't care. But at the time when I took the decision, I just said, I'm gonna be in a picture, and I'm not gonna look at it and I'm just gonna move on. I can look at it later. I can look through it later. I'm not gonna hyper fix it on it. I'm not gonna let it decide anything about how I feel about myself. I'm just gonna make sure my first goal was to be in pictures. Nothing else mattered. I started doing that again and again and again. I started, yeah, asking people to take pictures of me. I stopped volunteering to be the one to take photos. I never hyper analyzed the pictures. I looked at them when I wanted to. I moved on from them, and I think I enjoyed so much suddenly having like this visual representation of my existence and my family's life really. It sounds funny, but that's what it is, that I stopped caring about everything else because I realized like, Holy cow. It's amazing. Like I have in the birthday pictures, the gone pictures, the first day of school. Like I'm in all of that. Where was I before? Like, this is so valuable, nothing else matters. And it was, it was really like a giant hug to myself. And so I started with that. And then as time went on, I just became totally like neutral about it. There are pictures where I look better. There are pictures where I don't look as good and like none of them mean I'm a better or worse person. Like I'm an awesome person. Exactly. I'm also a person who, who, when I sit, I have stomach rolls. When I look down, I have a double chin. When I. Uh, I'm sneezing my eyes close in pictures like I'm a normal human.
Rebecca Sigala:I was about to say like, so you're a human, like everybody.
Sharoni Galeano:Yeah, exactly. Everybody has that. Like, when I'm tired, I have bags. When I don't do my hair, it's messy. When I wake up in the morning with my kids in my bed, like I don't look like I do when I'm going to an event, but that pictures not less, less valuable. My like, it's just exactly that. I probably will like that messy picture better because it's. More of a representation of who I am as a person, my life as it is. So I think we have to decide, do you wanna only have photos that are, you know, when you're made up and posed with perfect lighting and everyone smiling, that might not be actual representation of your life. 365, days a year, or do you want to look perfect in every photo? I personally don't, and I don't think you should too, because they're not gonna be representative of you. And I think the more you practice that and the more you say, I'm just gonna be in photos and I'm not gonna care, you're gonna feel so free. It's like the most freeing thing ever.
Rebecca Sigala:Why do you feel like women feel the need to have to look perfect in images? Where does that desire come from?
Sharoni Galeano:Well, one society. Mm-hmm. A woman society for everything. The way we were raised. The things you see around you. I can probably remember the first time I heard someone opting out of photos, like, I can, I'm not, it doesn't matter who it was, but I remember I had a family member and we took photos and she's like, no, no, no, I don't wanna be in photos. I remember being a kid and me like, but why? And she's like, I don't like how I look in photos. And then it was just kind of accepted that she was never in photos. And I remember as a kid thinking like, that's so sad. But then I grew up and I opted out of photos too. cause that was an option. And I think
Rebecca Sigala:it's so normal. Like it's just how women are supposed to see themselves, almost like right. We're, and a lot of expected not to, like how we look in photos. We're expected not to like our
Sharoni Galeano:bodies, or even someone, sometimes it happens a lot. I'll ask someone to take a photo and they'll be like, do you wanna see it? And I'm like, no. Like, I look great. I'm like a human. I'm great. You know, like I don't need to be perfect. It doesn't matter. Like, why do you assume I wanna see it? Why? What about like my husband? What about my kids? Why don't they wanna see it? Like I'm okay with it. and I think, gotcha. I think that, and I think like everything else on women, like we have all these expectations put on us that we put on ourselves to look perfect all the time. To be perfect, to have a clean house and cook dinner and work, but also be present and all of these things that are put on, either we put on ourselves or were put on us. And the same goes for photos and how we look, and it's just a bunch of bullshit and it's robbing us of enjoying life, of being present, of being captured. Like it's not, that's the thing though. It's not only robbing us of now, of being present now, but it's also robbing us in the future. Because when we look back, we're also not gonna have been present and it's going to keep going unless we decide now. What can I do to change this? Right? So this is like the most important thing we could talk about and it goes for everyone. Sometimes I post about this on my Instagram and a woman who's 60 will write, you know, because of what you said, I made sure to get in pictures with my grandchildren. Like, that's amazing. But it also so sad that like, She's been pulling this through to being a grandmother. Like it makes me sad, breaks my heart.
Rebecca Sigala:So true. Yeah. Actually when you were telling your story, it reminded me of one of my clients who, did a boudoir session with me. She's in her sixties and I asked her what was the main reason why she wanted to do it. And she said, same thing as you. She looked at her photo albums over all of the years'cause she's a grandmother now. Like she's in her sixties and she was nowhere to be found. And
Sharoni Galeano:it's devastating,
Rebecca Sigala:devastating, tragic, and also incredible that she realized it. And she wanted to do a shoot that was like really fully focused on her. But like, it almost made me cry. It was so emotional. So yeah, definitely like if you're in that position, you're definitely not alone in it. And at the same time, like you said, how do we wanna change this? How do we actually want to live our lives? And one thing that I really like that you said is like you tell your clients in the beginning of the session, it's gonna be awkward or uncomfortable for like 10 minutes. Right. And just ride through it. Like face the discomfort. Yeah. It's gonna be there. Don't avoid it, don't push it. And if you ride through it, You'll get to that next,
Sharoni Galeano:you'll get out on the other side.
Rebecca Sigala:Exactly. Right. And I think that's really like an amazing metaphor for all body image work because people don't wanna face this stuff. They don't wanna feel the discomfort of looking at an image that they don't like of themselves. Right. But that discomfort is so minute compared to the discomfort that you'll have years later when you're not in the photo or when you feel like shit about yourself and your body your entire life. So that discomfort, that facing the discomfort is actually the door to your healing
Sharoni Galeano:for sure. I wanna also say something that like, just to drive the point home that I think is heavy, but like I think we need to get there to kind of like, get this message out again. If you've never been to Shiva, that's amazing. I hope we don't have to be in Shivas, but if you've been to Shiva, I've been to many, what are people doing at a Shiva? They're sitting and looking through photos. Why? Because a photo is a piece to hold onto somebody forever and ever. And imagine people sitting at a Shiva and not having images of someone, what that would feel like for them. Yeah, and I just think like that should be the, I don't think it needs to be like a devastating thing to be the driving force. I think we should try to always look a positive, but I think like sometimes that's what it comes down to. Like what are you leaving of yourself?
Rebecca Sigala:Yeah. Yeah, that is huge. And also I just had this, this image of my mind of like, people looking at my boudoir
Sharoni Galeano:picture. Jva.
Rebecca Sigala:Oh my God. Oh my God. Okay. That's where my mind goes. Of course, of course.
Sharoni Galeano:That's hilarious actually. Um, oh my
Rebecca Sigala:god. Thank you so much for talking so openly about this. It's just so important and I like, I feel the passion in what you're saying. So do you think that this process of you finding neutrality in photos of yourself has. Helped you come to more body acceptance, just in general and like, what has that journey been like for you? Like are you more confident in your body now? Do you feel better about the way you look?
Sharoni Galeano:Um, I think definitely, I don't know if it's good or normal or what, like, I don't think so much about, about how I look. I grew up in a household that was really, like my mom and my sister are really girly and like feminine and they wear makeup and they dress up and they wear like purses and get their nails done and stuff. And I've always been, they wear purses. I don't know, it's just like we always talk about how I never have a person, like I'm just like walking around with everything in my pockets. But, I just like, I never fit that mold. I've always been just like a tomboy and I don't have makeup and I don't wear makeup, and I just like to be casual. So I think I had that aspect of myself, but when I struggled with like body image, it was like two opposite things that just, I felt like they like crushed me almost. And I remember feeling so much like. I had such a hard time with how I looked and I really tried to fit the mold during that time and I dressed differently and I wore makeup and like it was so, I was so far removed from who I was and my, at my core, I just, I really connect with just existing how I am and not trying to be anything else, not. If it's the way I speak or the way I behave, just like really being myself and for so long, it's like a big chunk of my life. I was so disconnected from that and it all came together with just saying like, I'm tired of like fighting this fight of dislike and who I am. Yeah. I don't wanna do that anymore. Like I am, yeah. I'm great how I am, I have a lot to offer and I'm just gonna show up as I am if it's being in pictures, if it's showing up for work. And I think it really all really tied together. Yeah, help me be better at my work because I show up. On social media, people connect with me. I connect with my clients.
Rebecca Sigala:You really show up on social media. You're doing reels. You're always talking. Do you think that's something that you could have done seven years ago? I, I could have never.
Sharoni Galeano:No, I could have never done that. Never, never. Not without a bazillion filters, not without like changing who I was, and I started out like that. That's the truth. Again, I don't judge people that show up. I think it's really hard to show up. So however you show up then it's great. Don't take what I'm saying and think like, oh, you can't show up. Show up how you show up, and then you'll find yourself. It's really hard to show up. So if you can do it like you're doing amazing, however you're doing it,
Rebecca Sigala:I love that. It's like, show up and then you'll find yourself versus find yourself and then show up.
Sharoni Galeano:That's the mistake that I think so many people make and I talk to so many people who are starting businesses and they're like, I just like, I have to get it perfect. Don't get it. Don't worry. Just do it like you'll never do it if you're waiting for it to, I would never do anything literally if I had to wait to be perfect because I just, I don't have the patience for that
Rebecca Sigala:and it's not even a thing. It's like it's an illusion in our mind that we could be perfect or that there is this idea of perfection when really I feel like what our people need to see is they need to see us because when we are ourselves, it gives other people the permission to be themselves. And that's really the space that we wanna create, not only online, but in our shoots and in our lives.
Sharoni Galeano:A hundred percent. I always think, and you might identify with this, for example, like a headshot. If somebody has a photo on Instagram or Facebook and then I meet them in real life, then it's like totally different. It's like very disorienting in the beginning. I'm like confused a little bit about it. So I think that's the same thing as if I had a different online present and then I showed up differently and each time I was like a different version. Like that would be very, first of all, disorienting to clients. And I think also it just wouldn't be aligned with anything.
Rebecca Sigala:Yeah, I totally agree. Like it's so also not just for us, you know, or what other people think of you, but it's so empowering when we have an image of ourselves that really does represent who we are right now, and not a picture of us from 10 years ago and not a picture of us when we happened to lose 10 pounds, but then gained it back in two weeks. Like really like who we are right now. And to appreciate it, to love it, and be able to proudly put that out in the world. It just is like this feeling of alignment of like, okay, this is who I am and it helps us build our own confidence and it makes us feel better about ourselves because we're not trying to be something or someone that we're not. And that in itself is so beautiful.
Sharoni Galeano:I think this is really important. I wanna sharpen what you just said. Yeah. It's exhausting to try to be something else. It is exhausting and it will eat away at you. And the best thing you could do is just say, I am what I am. This is what it is. And embrace it. Like, and really, it might sound funny if you are not in pictures and you don't let yourself be in pictures because you're not perfect, you don't like how you look, you don't like where you're living, how you're dressing, where you are, just let it go. Be in pictures, start now. Stop fixating on everything, and I promise you like it'll also open doors for other things. It'll just make you learn that you, as you are right now, are awesome and worthy. Sometimes you need to see it. You can't see it'cause you're so disconnected from it. So just do it and be in, first of all, it'll put you at ease. You'll be so much freer. I can't even explain it. Someone could show me the ugliest picture of myself, and I promise you, I will not care. I will not care.
Rebecca Sigala:Yeah. Oh my gosh. It's so liberating. Like if we, both of us go back to that time when we're so consumed with how we turn out in images or just our appearance in general, or needing to be perfect, if you just think about that time and how much of our time and our brains were consumed with thoughts of this, it's like astounding to think about, I don't know, a third of your day. Half of your day. Like even more sometimes
Sharoni Galeano:I also think like if women as a group, like as a society, I don't know what you call us as a species, but together, decide to just like embrace it ourselves and like show up as we are. It would be so freeing for each other too, because for example, social media. Literally is a highlight reel of curated content that people are seeing. So everyone's seeing it and think, well, her life is perfect, her house is perfect. Like, and then they're criticizing themselves. There's all the comparison since we're on it, how much bullshit that is. So if everyone would just show up without makeup, maybe without, you know, being super fancy dressed with the room that you just cleaned to make that video, just like show up as you are. And then we would all just be more content. Because not everyone can disconnect themselves sometimes, like they need the extra help. But if everyone would just put that effort in for each other, we would be bettering society for ourselves and for our kids. That's the truth.
Rebecca Sigala:Right? Right. And then it's not just like, oh, I accept myself. Fine. This is just the way I am. It's like a resignation, which is not necessarily very helpful to our self-esteem or our body image.'cause we're just like, we're not perfect. Like whatever. I'm just gonna let it go. Versus like, I'm letting it go because I am amazing. Because I am worthy because these things don't make me bad or wrong. They just make me human and I really like that idea of normalizing it because definitely that's really what it is. It's just we're human and there's so much beauty in that.
Sharoni Galeano:Definitely that that's where all the beauty is.
Rebecca Sigala:Yeah. Yeah. Wow, that's amazing. So what would you say to someone, because obviously all of this is so much easier said than done, and for both of us it's taken years to get to the place that we are. What would you say to someone who's just like, at the beginning of this journey or they really wanna get photos done of themselves or their family and. They just have so much fear around it that they don't feel like they can overcome in this moment.
Sharoni Galeano:I think like it's really scary. I understand. The way you're feeling makes a lot of sense given the society that we live in and probably the messages you've been given your whole life. Yeah, but sometimes we build up these dialogues in our head that we just lie to ourselves and tell ourselves, we're not worthy. We shouldn't be. We can't do it until X, y, and z. And like that dialogue you've built in your head is lie. You don't need to be a certain way to be in photos. And the best thing to do is really to just take this exercise on a day to day. Just start being in the photos and don't look at them. Just let's say for example, you're on vacation and you're on a hike and someone says, oh, let me take a picture, or that would be the opportunity where you would be the one taking the photo. Just hand the phone over and ask a stranger. Have them take that photo, put it in your pocket, and continue living your life. Do it once, do it twice, do it 15 times or a hundred times, and you're gonna see that you will feel differently. Maybe not the first time, maybe not the 10th time, but the hundredth time you will. And the more you do it and implement it, the easier it's gonna be and the more freeing it's gonna be for you. And who knows how you're gonna feel down the line. Now you're hearing from like me and Rebecca, and this has been years right, of us doing the work to kind of feel like this, but. Who knows how you're gonna be further down the line. You'll be freer and you'll have all these photos and that'll make you feel amazing. For sure. Yeah. So
Rebecca Sigala:Right. I totally agree. And I feel like it's so important that we see it as a practice versus just like you said, You have to find yourself and then you can show up. You have to feel whole and then do the thing. It's like, do the thing that's scary, do the thing that's uncomfortable over and over and over again, and then you will find yourself and then you'll gain confidence. It's like this beautiful, beautiful practice. And also it's not gonna be perfect. It's not just like, okay, I did this 10 times and now I have total confidence in myself. Or even like for me, it doesn't mean that I just feel a hundred percent amazing about my body every single day. Like there's days and insecurities and things that come up just like everyone else, but now, now I have a practice and, a mindset that I can always go back to, to like bring me back home to myself. And I feel like normalizing that and normalizing the fact that like it's not just that one day you gain confidence and that's it. It really truly is a practice. It's something really important to impart on everyone.
Sharoni Galeano:Definitely. I think while you're doing, I guess the practice, like just remove yourself emotionally and mentally from it. Just do the pictures, start getting used to it. Make it a habit. Just like waking up and drinking a glass of water before your coffee. Remove the emotional aspect that is valid, but just remove it for the time being and see how that becomes a habit. And then when you come back and you can like add back in, let's say the mental and emotional aspect of it, you'll feel differently.
Rebecca Sigala:Yeah. So beautiful. Thank you so much, Sharoni. Is there anything else that you would like to share with women or anything else that you want to say that maybe we didn't cover in our conversation today?
Sharoni Galeano:I'm sure sure's lots more, but just to end off with like you're really important. Be in photos. Like, don't sell yourself short because of all these little things you've been told your whole life because they're not true. You're important. You're worthy. Just do it for yourself. Do it for your friends, do it for your family. Um, you'll thank you later. They'll thank you later, and do it okay.
Rebecca Sigala:That is the perfect way to end off this conversation. If someone wants to find you, where can they find you and see all this amazing social media
Sharoni Galeano:on my Instagram. On my Instagram, definitely, sharoni_galeano. That's where you can find me.
Rebecca Sigala:Okay. Amazing. Thank you so much for,
Sharoni Galeano:thanks for having me. This was amazing.
Rebecca Sigala:If anybody has any questions, you can definitely reach out to either one of us. I know that we're gonna be posting about this, so you can write under the post, you can direct message us, you can email us. and there's definitely gonna be information on how to reach Sharoni in the show notes. So feel free to check that out. Bye bye. Thank you.